A new way of thinking

Read this article.  Soak it in.  It’s good.  Really good.  It is written from a Christian perspective, but I believe EVERYONE could learn a little something from this tidbit of wisdom.

The article is beneficial for both bride and bridesmaid, so pass it on too.

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Cheap Without the Cheesy

I got the cutest wedding invitation in the mail the other day.  I hung it on the refrigerator and even remarked on it to friends that came over.  Weeks later, I was shopping at Target…and, hello!…there were the invitations, sitting humbly on the aisle shelf.  I was amazed.  Those beautiful invitations were from Target?!  They were printed at home?!  Brilliant.  Loved it.  Since then, I always pass by that aisle and notice the latest invitation designs brought to you by your local neighborhood store.  Some are really quite stunning.

My cousin is getting married in January and has a limited budget (my favorite kind of wedding…truly).  I was telling her that she can save some money by going to Target and getting invitations there.  Then, I decided to go to Target.com and wow…their online selection is even more amazing.  Here’s an examples:

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So the disclaimer is this: First, I realize this isn’t for everyone.  Second, the store itself has a lot that the site doesn’t have, so be sure to look their too.  Also, you can make these little beauties even more stunning with colored ink.  Be creative.  If you find some that fit your theme…awesome, glad I could help!

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Mix it up

I don’t get it.  Since when are girls only friends with girls and boys only friends with boys?  That’s never been a rule, right?  So why are wedding parties organized that way?!  It’s like a middle school dance for goodness’ sake!  I recently saw a blog with bridesmen.  I loved it.  The bride’s closest friends were all men and she just didn’t feel right leaving them out.  She couldn’t imagine her wedding without them by her side.  How great is that?

Then I started thinking about groomswomen…why not?!  I actually love this idea.  Oh…and putting your siblings on your spouse’s side because they don’t fit the gender constraints…put ’em on your side!  Let them stand beside YOU at your wedding.  Let’s mix things up.  Let’s do things because they make sense.  Let’s include the people we WANT to include…regardless of expectations!

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For future reference…

This is cute.

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We’re More Like Kanye Than We’ll Admit

In case you haven’t heard, Kanye West lacks class.  The pop-culture world is in an uproar over his latest display of disrespect which is completely understandable, and blogs, tweets, and facebooks are flooded with people’s outrage.  As I am sitting here watching coverage of the spectacle, it makes me think…who hasn’t pulled something like this before?!  Maybe we don’t do it at a world-wide, televised event and maybe our name and reputation isn’t known across the globe…but we’re guilty.  Even more sad, we’re guilty of outright, public disrespect of our other halves…the ones we claim to love the most.

How many times have we stolen the limelight from our spouses or fiances?
How many times have we embarrassed them?
How many times have we disregarded their accomlishments?

This saddens me, and I’m done with it.  It makes me want to do better.  Way better.   My hubby DOES NOT deserve Kanye-like treatment.  He deserves the spotlight for soooo much.  And I’m committed to giving it to him.  In fact, I’ll be the one holding the light.  Will you do the same?

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The Joys of Changing Your Name

So now you’ve got to change your last name…why is it that the guys have it so easy in this whole wedding process?!  Ha.  That’s another post, I guess.  For now, I’ll focus on what you need to know to make yourself an official (insert groom’s last name here)!

First, just know that the task ahead of you isn’t impossible, and really…it isn’t that horrible.  In fact, if you’re reading this as a soon-to-be married woman, you can start a lot of the paperwork now and save yourself some time later!  So here’s the deal:

  • Driver’s License
    • Just go to your local driver’s license office with your marriage certificate and $10 cash. (Seriously, don’t forget the cold, hard cash.  I did.  I had to make two trips.)  There might be a wait, but other than that, it’s pretty simple.
  • Social Security Card
    • Go here
    • You have to provide a bit of documentation, but again…its pretty simple.  Apparently you can mail everything in or just go to the Social Security Office.  I did the latter and had a positive experience.  If you do go to the office, fill out the form beforehand and you’ll be golden.
  • Bank Accounts and Cards
    • Your marriage license should be sufficient (as well as another form of ID…even if it has the old name).  And remember, if you’re joining accounts with the hubby…he has to be there too!
  • Passport!
    • This is my personal fave as I LOVE to travel.
    • Go here
    • This was a surprisingly quick process (despite the government’s warning that it could take FOREVER).  And since you’re sending your actual current passport along with other super important docs, I’d definitely use a traceable delivery method like the site says…the good ol’ U.S. Postal Service can do that for you!
  • Insurance
    • Check with your provider about this
  • Vehicle/Title Registration
    • First, go here if you don’t already know where your County Tax Office is.
    • You’ll need documentation of your name change (i.e. Marriage License), current title & registration papers, and $28.
  • Other things to think about:
    • If you’re moving, don’t forget to ask the post office to forward your mail.
    • Apparently, this is also important…basically it tells the IRS you have a new address and a new name. (I’d say do this after your SS card is changed)

I hope this helps ease the headache for some of you.  Remember, even though I’ve done the ground work for you, it never hurts to double-check my research.  And just FYI, the driver’s license info is for Texas…in case you didn’t know.  Aaaaaand, in case you’re still overwhelmed, there are services out there (just google ’em) that you can pay for that will basically fill out most of the forms for you.  All you have to do is pull together the documents and show up to whichever office suits your fancy.

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Continuing Education

So I had a thought that hit me like a brick wall.  So simple.  Yet, so potentially life-changing.  It could change our nation’s disturbing statistics.  Here it goes…

So before we get married, many of us talk to friends, older married couples, and couples that are in the same stage of life as we are.  We take classes (like these) and get counseling from our religious leaders.  We read books (and blogs).  We more closely watch the marriages around us.  We do everything we can think of to prepare.  Then we say “I do”.  And then we have it figured out?!

Negative.

Why do we not continue to take classes?  To soak in the wisdom of our elders?  Keep reading?  And why is marital counseling seen as a last ditch effort?  Why can’t it be a preventive measure?

I will say, I know a FEW couples who have gone to a class or two to strengthen their marriage and I know couples that are beautifully intentional about seeking the wisdom of others.  But these couples aren’t the norm.  Tragic.

Be challenged.  If you’re married, continue your “education”.  If you’re on the path to marriage, commit to learning how to love and live together better long AFTER your big day.

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